‎Na God save me say I no follow them smoke Igbo for NYSC camp.

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‎Because if I had followed them that day, I for don dey explain myself to NDLEA by now.

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‎Let me tell you what happened.

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‎In 2024, I went to serve in Edo State after my direct posting no work. That my werey sure plug later burn for last minute.

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‎Omo, I just packed my bags and headed to Edo.

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‎Welcome to NYSC Orientation Camp, Okada.

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‎Immediately we arrived, they started searching our bags thoroughly.

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‎And guess who I saw among the people searching us?

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‎NDLEA.

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‎I was like, “Ah! These people follow us reach here?”

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‎But I wasn’t worried because I don’t use drugs.

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‎Until one NDLEA officer removed my perfume from my bag.

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‎I looked at him like:

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‎“Perfume? Na perfume you come dey find? Abi how e take concern your ministry?”

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‎I sha left him with God.

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‎Then something happened that made my camp experience even more interesting.

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‎I was appointed the Hall Governor of my hall.

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‎Meaning na me dey hold the hall keys.

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‎The guy under my bunk was appointed as my deputy.

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‎Cool Igbo guy.

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‎His life no hard at all.

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‎During my 21-day tenure, my hallmates actually enjoyed themselves, especially those who cooperated with me.

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‎But those Egbon Adugbo wey dem force leave house come serve?

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‎Omo.

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‎They gave me small headache.

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‎Initially, they probably thought my calm face meant I was a small boy.

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‎Until one day they discovered that I be confirm LASU Boy. As fine boy dey, Ogba dey!

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‎From that day, respect entered the building.

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‎They even started inviting me to Mammy Market to come enjoy with them.

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‎But since I don’t drink, I normally declined.

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‎Then there was this particular guy beside my bunk.

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‎Omo!

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‎This guy could beg for Africa.

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‎You drink tea?

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‎“Abeg make I taste.”

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‎You dey eat?

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‎“Abeg give me small.”

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‎You are having a conversation?

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‎Before you know it, baba don mount there.

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‎The man had no shame.

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‎At first, I thought he was just one naturally friendly guy who liked mingling with everybody.

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‎Especially those Egbon Adugbo.

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‎Anytime they were discussing something, somehow, somehow…

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‎Baba go appear.

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‎I never suspected anything.

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‎Nobody did.

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‎In fact, those Egbon Adugbo had suspected my deputy of being a snitch because of the way he sometimes moved around with officials on camp.

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‎They suspected the wrong person.

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‎Because this other guy?

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‎Na their guy.

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‎He would follow them to Mammy Market.

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‎Drink with them.

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‎Gist with them.

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‎Laugh with them.

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‎Everything.

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‎Nobody suspected him.

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‎Until the LAST DAY of camp.

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‎Na that day we discovered something that made everybody’s brain reset.

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‎This guy was an NDLEA undercover operative planted in our hall.

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‎I swear, I replayed all his actions in my head.

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‎The begging.

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‎The unnecessary mingling.

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‎The way he always appeared whenever certain people were discussing something.

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‎The way he sometimes disappeared during SAED and other activities.

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‎Everything suddenly made sense.

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‎That “Abeg make I taste your food” was not ordinary begging.

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‎Baba was working.

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‎He was probably trying to establish whether we were using food and drinks as a cover to take drugs.

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‎And remember those times the Egbon Adugbo were planning how to smoke Igbo?

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‎The man was there.

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‎Listening.

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‎Watching.

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‎Monitoring.

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‎And he didn’t expose them immediately.

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‎But where my own for worse be say I sometimes skipped morning duty and boring SAED classes.

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‎I would lock the hall door and sleep inside with whoever chose to cooperate with me.

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‎One day, this guy started cooperating with me.

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‎If I slept, he wouldn’t sleep.

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‎I even asked him:

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‎“Why you no go join them outside if you know say you no go sleep?”

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‎I thought he was just keeping my company.

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‎I didn’t know baba was probably checking whether we were doing another thing inside the hall.

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‎Imagine!

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‎I was there thinking I was the Hall Governor.

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‎Meanwhile, NDLEA was also running their own government inside my hall.

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‎I give it to the guy sha.

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‎He sabi his undercover work.

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‎And I’m almost certain he caught some of those Egbon Adugbo with Igbo.

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‎But he didn’t just go around exposing everybody.

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‎Maybe because by then, we had all formed that small NYSC family where everybody had each other’s back.

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‎Most of them knew I sometimes locked the hall and slept during boring SAED classes.

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‎They knew.

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‎They saw.

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‎But nobody snitched on me.

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‎And I never snitched on them either.

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‎Looking back now, the funniest part is that the person we all thought was the biggest Almanjiri in the hall was actually the person monitoring everybody.

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‎©️ Yushab Abolore Ayomide

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